Anxiety (long post)

The closer I get to my due date the more nervous I get! A year in a half ago My son who passed from SIDS when he was 2 months old. That was the most devastating thing that I've every had to go thru and it left me with scars that no sees! For a long time after he passed I couldn't close my eyes because I would have flash backs and be able to replay the morning I walked up to his crib to find him life less. But with counseling I've been able to cope and suppress my fears! Well tonight while sleeping I had a dream I found my unborn baby like that also! It was really vivid and I woke up feeling like I had lost two children. Sigh idk all I can do is pray that God wouldn't give me another blessing to take it away again!