Ugly AF is late, too scared to test..anyone else?

Tiffany • 32/Happily Married/ 9.5 yrs TTC-miracle baby girl born 6/28/16!! Miracle baby #2 due Feb 2018!
I've been on this journey for 8 years now with only disappointment as the result so every time AF is late I brush it off. BUT this time I have no period symptoms at all! I'm too scared to face the reality of seeing a BFN so I refuse to test until I hit at least a week late. Anyone else as crazy as me? Here's to day two late! ???