Af should start today?

I praying she does not show her face but I fell her coming. I been Ttc for years and started using glow four months ago. I can't handle another bfn test again?. I trying to stay positive but when all at the same time two of your sisters got pregnant and your brothers girl friend. Without even trying it takes part of your heart. I'm happy for them all but it's honestly killing me. Please just pray af does not show her face!!