Serious Questions and need advice/insight
What visitors do you guys plan on allowing after baby is born? How soon after baby is born? Do you plan on letting visitors hold baby or be really close to baby (face to face as some people have no boundaries)? What about taking pictures, etc?
I ask because I don't really have much of a relationship with my mother in law or sister in law. My sister in law and I have had issues since my husband and I began dating 2 yrs ago. I've attempted to reconcile with her over time but she ALWAYS does something that makes me regret it. I allowed her to be in my wedding (strike 3) and she cut up!! So much so that she pulled her mother, my mother in law, in a non existent situation on MY WEDDING DAY!! Image the atmosphere if your photographer asks you what is up with her. I had family and friends calling me days after our wedding asking me what was wrong with both her and her mother because of their presentation and attitudes.
Let me back track a bit...strike one....I was pregnant a little over a year and a half ago prior to us getting married and she made the comment "not to get too excited because it's still early and anything can happen..." Not even 2 weeks later I miscarried at 9 weeks. The part that hurt was that the baby stopped growing the week (7 weeks) the comment was made. For that reason, I have not allowed her to get too close to me or touch me because I believe peoples words have power.
So, I know it's my husbands sister and mother and I don't mind them coming to the hospital (for a short and I mean short time) but I don't want his sister touching my child or taking pictures (strike 2 sharing our personal intimate life events with total strangers without permission and them posting to social media about it). It's hard for me to understand how you can be for a baby if you care nothing about the mother. I'm just in super protection mode with my baby. I only want people around me at that time who I KNOW are for me and genuinely care about me. After all, it's major surgery and I'm not obligated to allow anyone to visit.
My husband and I have talked about it and he understands but I know that he is a bit hurt by it.