Moody and emotional today

Feeling moody and emotional today and all I wanna do is leave work and go home and go to bed. I'm hoping I get my bfp this week but also don't wanna hope too hard so I'm not disappointed but also wanna keep the faith and believe it can happen. Every couple of minutes I feel like I l'm gonna just burst into tears. Ttc is hard. Sometimes I wonder if this is punishment for something I've done or if we haven't earned parenthood or whatever. I don't get it.