So in October I had a miscarriage at 2 weeks...I was just thinking back on it as June 14th would have been the due date. Fourth of July my husband and I send up lanterns with names of loved ones we have lost over the year and I had a hard time writing it down this year. I put Baby Riley on it and sent it up I know that things happen for a reason but its still a heartbreaking thing...its getting just a little easier to talk about it but still breaks my heart every time I think about it. However Tuesday night I was in the ER with my uncle and I saw a family holding the body of a baby who couldnt have been a year old yet...they were crying and screaming. I can honestly say I couldnt have done it. I am in no way saying Im glad I miscarried but I am glad that if the baby wasnt even going to surrvive a year that it happened before I had realized I was pregnant. It doesnt change how hurt and upset I am that the miscarriage happened but I dont think I could have survived loosing my baby when they hadnt even had a year on this earth with me...I know one day Ill meet that baby in heaven and Ill get to spend an eternity with her or him and honestly thats what gets me through the day. That and knowing one day that Rainbow baby will be in my arms.