Just married is this Normal?

Question

My husband and I got married a month ago and just moved in with each other two months ago. Everything was going perfect it was all I had imagined it would be. Marrying my high school sweetheart and just this past week I don't feel a spark anymore we argue over little things but mostly about money. We barely have sex on my behalf because I don't feel like I'm attracted to him as I once was. Is this how marriage is supposed to be? Any advice would help.!

Answer

It'll take a bit of an adjustment living together. Marriage is all about love, trust, honesty, communication, and compromise. That "spark" sometimes flickers and it takes some fuel to the fire to get it to ignite again. I strongly suggest "picking your battles" if its not worth a fight or bickering, talk it out calmly. Money isn't everything and don't let something like that come between you. Maybe sex is something you both need. That physical romance does wonders for a relationship sometime and is exactly what you need to regain that spark. If you're truly unhappy and not in love with you husband anymore that is something you and him need to discuss. If you are distancing yourself from your husband already that's not going to do anything but hurt your marriage. My best advice would be to communicate with him and be 100% honest otherwise nothing will change and nothing will be fixed. A good heart to heart talk never hurts a relationship.

Answer

The first year of marriage is hard, plus you have the added stress of just moving in together.  I would sit down and honestly speak to him about how you are feeling. Try a nice date night, or do something silly together , like go play  mini golf or bowling. He may be feeling the same way you are.

Answer

Definitely not how marriage is supposed to be.  Even in our first year (been married 3+ years) it wasn't bad at all we were in the honeymoon phase and still could be...What made you marry him in the first place? What made you fall in love with him? Did he change? I don't understand how it just happened all of a sudden.  Try to go on date nights and connect with each other.  Try to remember why you love him.

Answer

That "spark" you're talking about is the honeymoon faze. People tend to get on eachothers nerves after you're with one another all day long, everyday, and they get nervous when they become responsible for someone else. You just have to learn to help eachother. If you take care of him and make him feel appreciated, then he will take care of you and make you feel 
adored. The first 5 years are the hardest, is what I've been told. We'll married for 3years this September. <3
Life is pretty hard, but I couldn't imagine myself not being married to Timothy. I know that I chose the right person, and I'm glad that I chose him when I did.
Everybody bickers, and gets mad.
It's the times after that and in between that matter.
Your problem isn't eachother, it's the world.

Answer

You stopped dating each other.. No matter married or not if you don't continue to woo each other it's going to fall apart.. You also have to find a rhythm living with another person.. It's hard at first but you get the swing of it.. Even when I want to kill my husband I still greet him with a kiss.. Even when I seriously would rather burn holes into him with my eyes.. Still kiss him goodnight.. Even when I don't want to be near him I cuddle him in bed.. It forces me to continue to be close to him until I've overcome whatever it is that is bothering me so bad with him..

Answer

My husband & I had a rough adjustment to living together-- it took us a few months to get used to it. We'd been long distance for a couple of years, & he didn't have a job at first so going from mostly being alone to NEVER being alone was jarring. It will pass. Marriage is the BEST!

Answer

That doesn't sound normal. Yes, marriage isn't a piece of cake but for you to only be married one month and feeling that way, that's a bit concerning. Perhaps if arguing wasn't a common thing before moving in together then that aspect is "turning you off" so to speak which is causing you to question things and thus you think he's less attractive. You need to discuss how you feel with him regarding the arguing and lack of sex. You're marriage will not survive without communication and it is not a good start that 3 weeks in (since you've said for the past week) you're already second guessing things. I would think there had to have been underlying issues or thoughts like this before you got married, but it's hard for us to give advice when we're not in your relationship or know the dynamic.

Answer

Like others are saying, the first year of marriage can be challenging. And there is no "supposed to be" in marriage. Each marriage is unique. I have been in your exact situation but love my husband more than anything! Spark and attraction rise and fall with time. It's natural! Don't sweat it. A good marriage doesn't run off of feelings and spark-- you have to make the decision to love & stand by your husband daily even when you aren't feeling attracted to him or lovey-dovey. If you make the decision to stay committed to him heart, mind, soul, and body, the feelings will follow. Best of luck!

Answer

This is how marriage the 1st year or 2. Marriage is hard, but this is when it's hardest. You two really have to survive on love. If you don't feel ir anymore, make an effort, communication is key. You two decided you want to spend the rest of your lives with each other, it's a serious commitment. This is not a relationship, this is a marriage you have to love each other and work to stay strong. You have to an adult. 
Remember why you love him and never forget that In the years to come.
Build a home together, a family. Be each other's partners and love. You HAVE to be a wife and he HAS to be a husband. Love. Respect. Communication. Trust. Understanding. Prayer.

Answer

So do you love your husband?

Just married is this Normal?

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