Am I being reasonable?

Question

My hubby has been insisting lately that I go see a therapist and get back on my anti-depressants. I don't feel that I need to be medicated. However, I suffer from clinical depression and have done so for years. A few years ago before we got serious about TTC I took them. After I had an ectopic last year I chose to stop them once I found out I was pregnant. I never got back on them. I don't feel the risks are worth it. We got into a heated (somewhat) discussion last night. He wants me to get back on them. He thinks that they will help and wishes I would go back. He feels I am in need of them. I once again informed him that I do not feel the risks are worth it & that though I don't feel that I need them I would compromise. After we have a baby I would go back and see a therapist & if the therapist felt that I need to be on them that I would gladly do so. I know he worries and is concerned that I'll get postpartum. However I don't want to take the risks that something could be wrong because I'm on mess like that. I felt that I gave a good compromise; though he didn't verbally say it, I could see it on his face the sadness and concern. What do you think? Am I Being Reasonable?

Answer

At least talk with a therapist and talk about the options for you. Maybe you don't need to go back on antidepressants , bit you need to do certain things to keep your depression in check, so that it is not controlling you and your life. Sometimes those medications make things worse, so just talk to your doctor .

Answer

Your friends and family (most especially your husband since he lives with you) are going to see changes in your behavior before you do. There are medications that you can get on that won't affect ttc or a developing baby but you need to see a therapist to determine the best options.  You aren't the first pregnant woman or ttc'ing woman that needs antidepressants. It sounds like your husband feels strongly about this and I think the compromise ought to be that you make an appointment and discuss medication options that will be safe during pregnancy and you start taking them right away. Then your DH won't have a worried look on his face.

Answer

In my personal experience, friends and family see changes in your personality and behavior before you do. I understand and respect your choice to stay off meds due to TTC/baby reasons, but it doesn't hurt just to go to a therapist to see if maybe you're starting to go down that depression slope and what you can do for yourself without medication.  Your husband is looking out for you and obviously wants what is best for you. I think going to a therapist to be assessed and talk about it is the best option.

Am I being reasonable?

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