When I think of the future I envision my lovely little family of 3. I always have pictured my husband and I with a child we will dote on exclusively.

I don't want any dilution of resources; time, money, or energy. I love my daughter, she was 100% planned and the light of my life. But motherhood doesn't change who I am. And who I am is an introvert than REQUIRES some measure of solitude and peace to maintain sanity. I don't want a life of refereeing fighting siblings, being outnumbered by little people, unable to relax. I only have so much patience and I am unashamed to admit that with multiple kids I know for a fact that frustration and exhaustion would constantly creep into our interactions. At my work I see the family's with one child and the ones with several. The atmosphere and "vibe" within the dynamic is completely different. I want that calmer vibe for my household. I could never justify having another just so my current can have a playmate, that's not sufficient. There will always be pros and cons of having an only but for us it is just right. Not to mention, after my placental abruption, premature delivery and weeks in the NICU, I would be a nervous wreck through the entire pregnancy.

My daughter is perfect. I feel like I won the lottery. So I'll probably stop buying tickets now. :]

one and done