Pregnant but terrified..

Hi I had a miscarriage on november. I didn't bleed no cramps nothing on my first ultrasound there was a very shaped baby but Mia (thought it was a girl so I named it) had no heartbeat and mesured 9 weeks when I was 11 weeks along. Now 5 months later I'm pregnant again And I'm so scared so stress it's not going to make it. I'm terrified and confused I want to feel happy but I'm so scared to get exited because Previous from this last miscarriage I lost a baby boy at 23 weeks. I have nightmares I can't sleep I feel a little back pain and already thinking I am having a miscarriage. I can't feel full of joy because I just can't due to this. I want to tell everyone but again I don't to hear "I am so sorry for your loos" and for everyone to think that something is wrong with me like they always do. 😭