Upset
I just found out today I wasted over a year with a man who knew he would always be incapable of loving me - who always knew he would never see me as marriage material.
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I gave him everything he wanted. I did everything he wanted. Because he was everything I wanted. I made excuses for his behaviour and mistreatment. I told everyone he wouldn't do the bad things to me, I was different. He once said he loved me, even.
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But I was a hobby, a time filler. Whereas I spent 15 months thinking of him as an investment, he spent that time thinking of me as a way to pass time. He dared question my understanding of our relationship when he asked, "Why would you think I ever wanted something serious?"
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He pointed a finger at me, and asked if I honestly consider every relationship to be serious. I said I'm an adult. I invest time in people because I want a future with them. He disagrees.
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How could he, how could anyone; spend 15 months of their life with someone they have no intention of sticking by long term? How could you waste 15 months of someone's time, effort, money and love to never ever tell them you don't want anything serious. How?
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