Venting and I'm need of an answer please..πŸ˜“

So here's the scoop. About a month and a half ago I had told my bf that I cheated on him with another guy because the other guy was giving me more attention to me than my bf (the guy that I cheated with my bf, works with me, but to this day I don't speak to him anymore). Anyways I had told him everything the week that he had just gotten back from his road trip with his guy friends. He gave me all the attention when he returned as if I haven't seen him for months. I loved it when he did that and it made me feel so disgusted and hurt myself of what I did to him. While he was away I cheated on him once and before then I cheated on him two more times in the beginning of the month. So in total I had hung out with this guy three times and messed around but never had sex. After when I had told my bf everything, he was super sad and he started to cry and so did I. I kept telling him I was sorry but he never said anything but just hug me. A few days later he told me he didn't want to break up and still wanted to be with me. I had told him I didn't want to either and that I wanted to be with him forever. A week later I told him I wasn't going to be able to see him for about 4-6months and he knew why (not going to say why, personal reasons, so don't ask why). The last time we had hung out we had spoken to what was to become of us in the future. I ask him to please wait for me and that I would never be with anyone while I'm away and I'll not only come back to him for him but for my self and god, but he told me he couldn't promise me that. He said he loves me so much and it was supper hard for us to leave and let go that night. 
To this day I have hurt myself in writing letters to him on how I feel and how I've truly messed up and how truly sorry I am for hurting him and his family. I know he still thinks of me because he wears the gifts I brought him a long time ago. I know before when I told him what I did, he told me that he still wanted to be with me. This makes me think he truly does love me. I'm his first everything and I want to be his last. The last days with him he told me to promise not to forget him. And to come back as soon as I can to him. How can I know that by when the 4-6 months is over he will still be there for me when I return? How can I know that he still wants to be with me? How can I have hope that we will be together again? I know he truly loves me, but I'm just hoping he's there when I return. πŸ˜žπŸ˜”πŸ˜“

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