CHEATED ON MY HUSBAND

I just cheated on my husband of two years. We have been together for almost 10 years. We are going through it right now (and always) and I really want to leave him. I cannot financially support myself and our two kids without him so I have stayed for way longer than I should have.

I have this guy "friend" that I have known since my freshman year in highschool, Which is now well over 15years. We have always wanted to be with each other but have had horrible timing. When I was single he had a girl or when he was single I had a man. We recently started hanging out again behind my husbands back. And today it finally happened y'all. After over 15 years of knowing each other we finally had sex. It was good y'all! Even with my mind full of thoughts and emotions during the act it was still good. Now I can only imagine what it will be like when I'm fully in it. Now I want to go back for more. 😐

Part of me feels A LITTLE guilty for doing that to my husband. The other part of me fells nothing. I have been so emotional/ physically/ mentally disconnected from my husband for so long now that it almost doesn't feel worng. Now don't get me wrong I know what I did was awful. I just really needed to be able to get that out and hopefully some of you ladies can give me advice on what I should do.