It's not you, it's me...

Today my boss wanted to have a "team growing" meeting. It was his cute spin on "we need to discuss issues". I knew this. I know him well enough to know when he is beating around the bush and what his true intentions are. I wanted to prepare the team so I told them to come to the meeting with any issues they are having that we can all discuss. Little did I know the issue was ME!  

How embarrassing. My boss set up a specific meeting just to have my fellow workers vent about their frustrations with me. My first thought was "fuck them! I work harder then all of them! I have more work ethic! I come into work before them and I leave after them. I am flawless at this job". Needless to say, I went home PISSED. How dare they talk behind my back! How dare they expect so much of me. Then it hit me... 

they aren't the problem. I am! It's me! I can't blame everyone else for my short comings. I am beyond embarrassed but motivated to work harder. I don't want my coworkers to be frustrated with me.... but I'm not gonna lie though, my feelings are hurt and I am not confident that tomorrow I can put on a good face. I just can't believe my boss called a meeting to discuss my problems 😖  

I am just so embarrassed.