is it abuse?
So I'm 15 and my boyfriend and I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. But the when it came to it the first time, his parents were downstairs and we couldn't even take our clothes off, just pulled the pants down.
I felt awkward and he knew that, and when he asked me if I wanted to I said I didn't know but I didn't really feel like it. The whole situation was so uncomfortable to me, he kept asking me and getting annoyed at my inconclusive answers, and I wanted to avoid an argument. So eventually I said 'ok', but he knew I didn't want to. He knows me and he knew but we did it, and it hurt a lot.
At the time I had no idea how to feel apart from icky. Looking back on it, I still don't know what to think. I don't want to say it was rape, because it's such a heavy accusation, but was it? I need help :(
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