Am I overreacting?

Question

I've been talking to this guy, T, for almost two months now. We have kissed, had sex, cuddled, and did a bunch of things that would have others believe us being in a relationship. Yet, T never had asked me to be his girlfriend due to him going through a process of a divorce and his baby mom had their daughter almost a month ago. His majority of the time is with his daughter. It's a bit weird because I never went through this situation before and I don't get to see much of him since he's with his daughter. Just this Thursday he came to my place and seen me. I was super excited and he gave me kisses and hugs. He did kiss me in front of his ex-father-in-law's friend so I'm assuming that's a good sign? Then the day after he came over again and gave me hugs. Which I soaked in all his cuteness up because I never know when I'll get to see him again tbh. But something today happened. He texted me, like he has been doing for awhile now, and he was getting frisky. He did send me nudes for the first time. I wasn't expecting it and my first thought was him being a fuckboy because I have talked to guys before and they send me nudes then best be on their way doing it to another gal or gals. Idk if I'm just assuming the worst because I have been played before. So far this is the only guy I truly do like a lot and the only one I have talked for for more than a month and a half. But then again we have gotten intimate before and this was the first time he sent nudes so I reckon it's not as bad as I'm pertaining it to be? Obviously he looked great and I made sure he knew too. I honestly don't want to lose this guy. I want us to stay in each other's life for as long as it may be. What are your thoughts? Input is what I need tbh.

Answer

I hope you don't mind me being honest. I know you like this guy and I don't want to disrespect him but... I have two problems with him. 
1. The Lesser issue is that he sending nude pics. That's just not a great sign of common-sense. In addition, since you two are so new, and he is so comfortable sending nude photos, I would put down a good deal of money that he does this on a regular basis.
2. My main problem.... He has a baby daughter and he's dating. I have no problem with divorce or single parents dating. But right now, especially with a divorce going on, all of his spare time should be with his daughter. The fact that he is dividing it to be with someone new does not make me a fan of his at all. In fact it tells me more about why he's getting divorced. Don't you want a guy that says look I like you and I want to keep talking to you but right now my priority is my daughter ?

Look, I don't want to be a buzz kill or be insulting and anyway but please really think hard about whether this is somebody want to be with

Answer

Honestly. You aren't his gf or on a relationship. You are friends with benefits or hook up status. Unless it's official don't take anything a man says with a grain of salt. Most men are full of crap and just tell you what you want to hear. Take things slow and really get to know someone. If your gut feeling is saying he's a waste of your time then he probably is.  It's a lot to deal with someonebthat had a kid and going through a divorce and a baby mama. She controls him. If he wants to see the kid he has to kiss her butt. She can ruin date night at any time oh the kid is sick or I can't find a sitter etc and use that kid as emotional leverage if she wants to.  If she doesn't like you she can say you can't be around her kid. Are you prepared for all of that. Are you willing to make those kinds of sacrifices. You are already feeling like an outsider honestly with your you don't know when you will see him next since he's always with the kid and got a lot on his plate. He could also still being seeing his baby mama on the side. Or other women since you aren't in a commited relationship. I wouldn't hold your breath honestly. Keep him at an arms length. Let him settle his divorce. And whoever else he's sending pictures to. It just gives me that he's stringing you along vibe too.

Am I overreacting?

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