Giving up having a bio child.

Long story short, before I go to get an HSG test, the doctor wanted me to go get a pap smear to get a baseline for me. I went, it was my first one ever and it was extremely painful. Now if I can't handle that how am I supposed to handle an HSG. The speculum hurt extremely bad. I'm still cramping and feeling discomfort a day later. i feel like I'm letting my husband down because I said I am nowhere near comfortable continuing on this path of testing. The only alternate option is adoption which we both are okay with but he really wants a bio child. I feel like a failure but I know I can't go though with the tests, let alone IUI/IVF. I guess I'm just looking for reassurance whatever I choose is okay and I'm not a failure. adoption is such a process but honestly I just want to be a mom. my husband is supportive but I know he is disappointed about how I took the pain. I'm disappointed in myself.