School struggles

Lylli • Hey my name is Lylli and I'm 17! I enjoy painting, drawing, roller coasters, and kitties.

Ever since school has started back up I ive noticed a steep decline in my health. I was finally feeling better around the last month of summer, happy and fairly confident. But now I'm getting thoughts in my head calling me worthless and dumb and ugly, even though a part of me knows it's bull. I feel more lethargic and days feel shorter, and a heaviness is weighing down my chest. This mostly goes away when I'm with friends but otherwise it's all coming back. I was suicidal last winter and I really, really don't want to go back there but I know that a large reason is the tension and struggle school puts on me and my relationship with my family. Does anyone have any tips on how to nip this is the bud? I've tried to tell myself positive things but I'm believing them less and less.