It's been 2 days since I found out my baby doesn't have a heartbeat. The grief and the heartache have thrown me for a loop. Im going to be scheduled for a D and C sometime this week.

Tomorrow I'm suppose to go back to work but I feel like I'm not ready to face reality and need some time. I'm not ready to face the questions of what happened at our appt and the "oh I'm so sorry's." I know my coworkers care but I'm not ready to face this.

I let my husband know I am taking the week off (I only work 4 days a week and I know I have some sick time available, I just don't know how much) and he freaked out that we can't afford for me to take that much time off. I apologized and told him I wasn't ready and he got frustrated and went on a walk to cool down.

I don't want this to come between us but I also know that we are two people who cope with things differently, especially grief. And this is the first time in our 5 1/2 year relationship that we have had to deal with such grief together. I'm really I trying to not let this become a huge ordeal but at the same time this is hard. It's also hard for me because I still have my baby inside me and I will have to relive everything come the day of our procedure.

I just don't know what to do and I feel so lost. I know my husband cares for much about me and loves me dearly but I do wish he would be a little bit more supportive with my decision and let me take some time to heal.