I had a miscarriage in March at 10 weeks. We started trying again after a couple months and now I'm 5.5 weeks pregnant. My first ob appointment isn't for another 3.5 weeks because I wanted to schedule it on a day my husband would be able to go. (He is very involved and LOVES my new ob. I would also want him there for support in the instance of any bad news.)

The days are crawling by. Every little feeling sends me into a mild panic/frenzy of what ifs. Whether it's a little extra wetness down there and I have the NEED to go make sure it isn't blood and the racing thoughts of "no, not again" or the light cramps I have here or there, which I know are normal and likely just my uterus stretching to accommodate baby... I just can't shake my fear. I'm so afraid of losing this one too.

We don't know the cause of our previous loss. I started spotting brown and it gradually increased and turned pink then bright red and heavy. I eventually passed the baby at home. I had an ultrasound to confirm and my doctor said everything looked fine and that he didn't expect us to have trouble conceiving again. It took two cycles to get my BFP.

When I did see that wonderful second line, I didn't believe it. It was the day before my period was supposed to start and it was darker than the tests from my first successful pregnancy and MUCH darker than any of the tests from my miscarried pregnancy. I took 4 tests the first day, three the second day. I took another just now, 2 weeks after first finding out iuuuust to make sure it wasn't a fluke. The line showed up instantly but I just can't help being paranoid, overly cautious, worried.

How have you ladies who have had your rainbow babies kept your sanity throughout the pregnancy?