Masturbation

Okay.. So, I'm 18. I lost my virginity when I was 16 to my boyfriend of 5 years... (Still together btw.) He moved 2,000 miles away not too long after we had made love to each other for the first time. Which, btw, we only were able to do 4 times... I haven't been able to do anything with him since 2015. So, I masturbate. Quite a bit, honestly. I like both penetration & clitoral stimulation. I have a toy. But it hurts to use if I try putting it inside me. And I don't know if it's because I haven't done anything in so long or what. But just the clitoral stimulation isn't enough for me. I wish I could have both. But it just isn't working for me. Any suggestions...?