This month marks 2 years TTC

I have been on clomid now for 6 cycles. Getting peak ovulation results every month, but still not getting my BFP. I feel completely lost and broken. I feel like I let my husband down every month AF shows her ugly face. I feel like this will never happen for us. We have an appointment with a fertility specialist next month, but I am just feeling so defeated. I don’t tell my husband because I don’t want him to feel I am giving up. I want this more than I have wanted anything in my life. AF is due in two weeks, so alas we wait. Sorry to vent. I just needed to get the words out of my brain. Ugh. 😥😥😪