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I'm so tired already of trying

I'm sorry for the rant but i just have to vent. I told myself that i wasn't going to test but i couldn't help it. I am 8 dpo and i know ot is still early but i just want to know so badly. It was negative, i just want to cry.

I really though this would be our mouth. I felt like i did everything right, but i feel like now i was all wrong. I really feel like i will get my period on the 18th. I just don't know where i went wrong.

me and my husband danced a lot as you can see. But after taking this test i feel like i am out this mouth already.

I feel so lost right now. I am 34 years old and my husband is 24 years. I have children from my last marriage. But my new husband wants a child so badly with me and i want to give him that but i feel like a failure. I feel like it is all my fault.

why is this happening to me. When i tried to conceive before it didn't take me long at all. I just feel like this is taking forever. Why is it so hard to do something so natural.

I know that i am not alone in this process but i feel so alone, we are not telling anyone that we are trying. So i have noone to talk to besides my husband, and i know he loves me very much but sometimes i feel like he doesn't really understand what i am going though each mouth. I know it must be hard for him as well but all he has to do is wait. I have to go though fake symptoms that make it feel like I'm pregnant but I'm not. And of course there is the long two week wait just to find out your not pregnant. Like.....

I really hate myself right now because i tokd myself that i was going to wait, but i see all these other girls getting their positives at 7dpo 8dpo 9dpo 10dpo. I am happy for them, i just want my positive too.