Rant//Long

I need to rant because if I don’t I might just blow the hell up.

We’ve had our childbirth class scheduled for over a month. They only do them so many times and our hospital is over an hour away. I️m 33 weeks and as you probably know it’s getting more uncomfortable to sleep. I had failed hip surgery in April so I can’t sleep on either side which is normally the most comfortable for me, but since I can’t I have to sleep on my back of sprawled out like some kind of dead spider. This pregnancy has been the literal LAST thing on my mind, it was unplanned and I’m still not on terms with the idea of having a child. ( that’s another story ) but I knew that it was recommended to go to this class and I sucked it up and scheduled it.

FFW to this morning- I’ve slept maybe 5 hours in 3 days because of being in pain and the anxiety from the pregnancy. We fell asleep around 3/4 because he works nights usually and he’s off his schedule so I didn’t expect to get good sleep last night anyway, but we wake up and He complained the entire fucking time we got ready. Then “forgot” to tell me we had to leave ( I know I should have checked my phone, but thought they he knows this is important to me so it’s fine ) so we ended up leaving almost 20 minutes later. Then we got in the car and he wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it so we turned around and now he doesent know why I’m pissed off.

And now that he got his way he’s kissing my ass. “Oh did you want to do anything now that we’re awake?”

No, I wanted to do the one god damn thing we were supposed to do and have had scheduled for over a fucking month.

Do you think that was my choice of a Saturday morning? Spending it sitting in a classroom with people I don’t know talking about the reality of something I don’t even want to talk about?

No, but I knew that it was something that needed to be done and sucked it up.