after really trying for 9 months i saw two strong lines. That was the happiest day of my life followed by 5 to 6 weeks of equally happy days. Even when i got sick i had a smile on my face. We scheduled our first ultrasound at 7 weeks. We were told that the beautiful image with a strong heartbeat was 6 weeks. i was concerned because if anything i expected to be told we were further along then my calculation due to a weird period the month before getting a bfp but that feeling was silenced by my excitement and we were told to come back in a week so we could have an actual 7 week ultrasound. i arrived nervous but excited to the second appt. the ultrasound started but i couldn't see the heartbeat and it looked the same. i knew at that moment it was bad news. we went back to the waiting room to be called by the midwife. once we met with her she explained what i already knew. she then said we had to decide on passing it naturally, taking pills to start the process or a d&c.; she recommend the pills if we wanted to start trying again right away. i agreed and went home immediately to start the process. this has been sad and confusing. i cant stop feeling like i should have waited or got a second opinion. dont get me wrong I know they were right i lost the baby but part of me is mad that I just immediately accepted what someone said despite loving this baby so much. i have been ok emotionally except i feel like i have to deal with everyone else being sad about it which has been hard. i dont know. now i want to delete this and not post it but i will to share the feeling of confusion and being all over the place. it just sucks theres no other way around it.