Need Advice..friend meeting my daughter

So my sister in law is gay and her ex gf was my best friend while they were dating. We had a falling out and stopped talking and now we’re talking again.

My sister in law is in the military stationed out of state and has had plenty of time to save to come home for Christmas but she didn’t so she’s not coming home. But her ex is and wants to meet my daughter. My SIL specifically said if we let her ex meet our daughter before she does she will be very mad but she had a chance to come home but she’s not. Is it wrong for us to let my friend meet her before my SIL???