I need somebody to talk too!

I have to vent, and need opinions 😭😭

Note ** now that it’s after midnight, baby is now a MONTH old.... continue reading.

I’m getting really really down and out because I strictly wanted to breastfeed with this baby because my first, I only lasted 2 and a half weeks because it hurt so bad, I couldn’t take the pain. But with this one, I wanted to push through the pain because eventually I knew it would go away.

Okay, so... I have made it past the painful part. Now, In the hospital my daughter didn’t test positive for Jaundice. Shortly a couple days after we left the hospital, we noticed she was getting a bit yellow. At her first doctor appointment the doctor said, she enough she had Jaundice and she had lost some weight.

(She was 9 lbs 6 oz when she was born 😳)

1st Doctor appt she got down to 8 lbs 14 oz.

So we had follow ups for the weight and jaundice. Jaundice progressively got worse. All in all, we made 4 different trips to the hospital to test her billireuben levels, and little by little they were concerned more and more. Her levels continued to rise. Finally, the doctor said since she’s losing weight, we’re going to put her on formula. You can continue to breastfeed if you want, but she is losing too much. (She got down to 8 lbs 12 oz. at 3 weeks.)

Our doctor said she had breast milk jaundice. Sure enough it went right away after doing the formula. 😕 it completely breaks my heart I wasn’t producing enough milk to keep her full and make her gain weight. -may I note * she would constantly cry and want on the boob, I guess because she wasn’t getting enough. After the formula, no more crying, and she is sleeping so much better. 😪

She’s currently on my boob as I’m typing this, but now I can go all day while we’re out and about and not breastfeed until that night, when before I would constantly have to feed because my boobs hurt SO bad because they were so full. They have completely shrunken. They still leak, but not until night time.

I am stuck. I just want to cry. I don’t want to give up breastfeeding. Is there any way to produce more milk ?

Please help. Tell me I’m not the only one going through this 😶😶