I'm not just going to leave him.

Why do people always assume a man without a job doesn't care, isn't trying, or isn't worth it.

Yes my boyfriend is unemployed, yes he has a family to provide for since I as the mother cannot, but yes, he is also kind, loving, there for me, and trying his fucking best. He's looking all the time for work, he has had odd jobs in the meantime, but they aren't always there.

I asked for some help on what to do now that my bills are due, and everyone said "light a fire under his ass", but what does that mean? Really, what does it mean, what words does one say to a defeated man who is feeling so helpless? Give me advice, tell me how to do it, so I can try. It's hard for me, because he is such a good man- he doesn't raise his voice, he's always understanding, he helps with the baby, and shares the chores, he doesn't look or talk or even think about other women, he tells me I'm beautiful stretch marks and scars and all, he's always supported me, I just used to be the main financial provider, and now I'm not, and he's struggling.

How can I dismiss someone so good, why are we told to leave a man if he can't provide, what if it were me who was struggling to provide and everyone told him to leave me- because I mean I am half of this team and I don't have a job either (I know my recent c section and me ebf is keeping me home, but what if I could be doing more?). I'm just feeling lost.