Me and my boyfriend been together for almost 2 years. And just to throw that in there: we are 15 years apart and he does have two kids (which I don’t mind). We met by accident, Elijah (we will use the fake name) was moving in with my uncle and me, Elijah was my uncles student (my uncle is a pilot) and when I 1st saw Elijah, I would say I felt the spark between us. So anyways, I didn’t talk to him much at 1st because we had another girl leaving with us (also my uncles student) and she liked him a lot. So, after I found out that she had feelings for him I kinda backed down. Well he wasn’t attracted to her. He only saw her as a dude friend. They did a lot of things together (bike, go to festivals, paddle board, etc). Well she became a bitch towards me cz he was attracted to me. She didn’t like that and she just became more insecure with herself and just became completely rude. So I didn’t like her after that. So anyways couple months down the road.... me and him finally hooked up and I guess started dating. He didn’t ask me out or anything. So we hid our relationship from everyone including her and my uncle, cz if he finds out..he will kick him out. But anyways, he was still hanging out with her too, so it wouldn’t be obvious. It would bother me, but I was trying to be understanding. But then it became so out of control, he would stay the night at her place (she moved out) and they would always hang it together and I was just kinda on outside. I tried to talk to him and let him know that it bothers me. He would just brush it off and say that he can’t just cut her out of his life, because then everyone would find out about us. At that point I didn’t really care anymore, because I was hurting. He kept brushing it off. So, after a while they stopped talking and I’m not sure why exactly. I was relieved, and we started hanging out more and more. Well my uncle got suspicious and i got in this huge fight with my uncle. So then I just had to move out. And I gave a key to Elijah and told him that if he ever needs to get away, he’s more than welcome in my place. So then he gradually moved in with me. And him and the other girl started talking again. I had enough because he knows she was rude to me and he knows that she has feelings for him and he knows that I don’t like her!!!!! So I told him he has to choose me or her. He chose me and he stopped talking to her completely as far as I know. I know he’s not a cheating type. He won’t cheat. He would talk to other woman and he wouldn’t realize that i don’t like it. I’m very jealous type. I wouldn’t mind him talking to other girl, but it’s just seems like he has more to talk to then about stuff than me. He talks to them the way I want him to talk to me. So we had other small fights and we had then a lot. Stupid little things. He would do something that bothers the crap out of me and I would try to talk to him about it and he would just sit there and stare at the floor and just keep saying “okay” and that just bothers the shit out of me. He just sucks at communicating and I’m all about it. Let’s sit down and talk this through!!!

So, when my apartment lease was up, he offered me to go with him to hometown and move in with him and his mom for a couple of week till we figure out next step.

Omg, he’s a mama boy! 🤦🏻‍♀️ At least I think he is...

I don’t even know where to begin.... so 1st thing 1st. He tells her EVERYTHING!! Every time we have a fight, he goes and tells her!!! Stuff that happens in our relationship should just stay between me and him. That’s it!!!!

She is his number one priority. So, I’m the type of person..if we are in a relationship, it means that we are a team and your problems become my problems and my problems will become your problems. We in this together!!!! We are a team. We share and talk about what’s happening in our lives and we discuss things. Well, not in this situation, because he just leaves me out of things and he runs to his mama!!

So the other night I was talking to him mom about his kids and whenever he gets them for good. How will that work? And she made it seem like I can’t put my foot or even a hand in there. Actually she said that!! So, I won’t have a say with the kids or anything. Like wtf am I doing here? I’m just gonna sit on the outside?? Kids or his life cz his mama got everything. I feel like I have no space left here for me... I’m just his sex doll. Which, I don’t want to have sex with him because he made a comment about me squirting and that it smells like pee, and idk if it’s supposed to or not and he started going and joking around that I’m peeing on him and he though he actually made me feel good. It just literally happens and it makes me feel good. Well, plus I was on my period when he made the comment and I’m super sensitive when I’m on my period. (If you have nothing nice to say, than don’t say anything at all). Well I tried to explained it to him that it’s not pee, and he was like idc as long as it makes you feel good I’m fine. I felt like he wasn’t getting the point and I was just trying to explain it to him and he was getting annoyed and getting in one of those moods where he would stare at the floor and kept saying okay. And I was getting more frustrated. So now we not talking and I don’t want to have sex with him anytime soon if ever.

So, I just don’t know if he is the one for me. I feel like I’m always the one who tried hard and I’m always the 1st one calling and texting and making plans. And I can’t read him. I want romance, I’m needy and just shout me that you put effort in this relationship.

I’m sorry it’s so long, but I just don’t know what to do anymore. I want to just pack my stuff and leave without telling him. By at the same time I’m afraid it won’t be the right decision. It’s so hard to explain what’s in my heart and mind. My heart says I’m overreacting and my mind says I deserve better. Please help!!!!