why?!?!

I've been pregnant 6 times... I have 2 children. Our daughter is 15 & son is 12. I'm 5'1 190 lbs, I have hypothyroidism, & hypertension. I'm tired of being told that if I lost 50 lbs I wouldn't have hypertension & I wouldn't have had miscarriages. at one point I was back down to 164 lbs & STILL had hypertension. My husband and I tried for quite a while then just quit trying & decided if it was meant to be it would just happen. But I have felt different lately. my period is not due for another 5 days or so but I went ahead & took a cheap test. it instantly showed up with a faint blue positive. BUT I have read too many horror stories about blue dyes (even though I've never had a false positive blue in my history of pregnancies) so I went and bought a first response pink dye and I don't see ANYTHING. ughhh I was really praying this was it. What a cruel trick 😢