UPDATE: My husband still wants to stay married. He says he loves me. He has told me he doesn't trust me and he believes my mother and Megan that I've cheated on him with Luke and everyone else. Luke and Megan broke up. My husband and I filled out the divorce papers, and have plans for our son and custody. Tomorrow we have a counseling session. Luke said I can move in with him and its not ideal but hes all I have right now and trust. Alex said it could be a temperary move and to clear our minds and then he'd want me to move back in and we'd stay married. In ways it could be good because it shows he trust me but at the same time i dont want to give him false hope. I dont even feel as if I love him and I don't believe love just goes away. 🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔 this is a very long story. I'm going to change names in this story. my husband Alex and I have been married for 2 years this past December and now have a 3 month old baby. my husband and I had some problems before our pregnancy of our son Matthew-Luke. durring our pregnancy we seemed okay, we bought a house, and planned. then Matthew-Luke was born. my husband started raising his voice at the baby when he'd cry. my husband told me he wanted to have 3 somes or that we should sleep with other people. my good friend Luke and I work together we are very close because of our dangers work environment and he recently had his heart broken by one of our friends he was in love with. fast forward to about a month after matthew-luke was born and Luke slept with one of our co workers that is know to be "psycho" she beat her ex's car with an Axe. she has harrasment restraining order against her, she smokes pot, and drinks all night. we'll call her Megan. I don't like her we've never got along at work. Luke said he only thought she wanted a one night stand but he felt pressure into dating her so they did. about 3 months since Matthew-luke was born my husband Alex and I still couldn't get things together. we set up counciling meetings and went to talk to his mother (my parents already knew). We went to my mother in law Alice and told her that we were having problems. we told her that Alex had said to me that he wanted me Dead and gone than just gone and happy. (which is true he said that) we told her he wanted to sleep with other people and have 3 somes. I told her he shuts me out and won't talk to me. she told us we need to work it out because we had a 2 1/2 month old son together. We went home and were having the first good evening in a long time. Alex's older sister Hannah lives with us and texted Justin this just after we talked with their mother.

well i was extremely hurt. I packed my things and started to leave. while I was getting my things Hannah stood in her room glaring out. she yelled at me "just like that you're going to leave?" I told her that I wasn't manipulating her brother I took our son Matthew Luke and left. I called my mom multiple times and no answer. my parents were mad that we were considering divorce so I didn't know if I could go there. I texted my friend Luke and Shannon that I was leaving and I had Matthew Luke and needed a place to go. Luke texted me back saying he was out on a date with Megan but his door was unlocked. he lives 45 minutes away from me but I drove to his house. once I got there my mother called me and said I could come over. for the sake of my marriage and because I would have rather been at my parent I drove another hour to their place. my husband came as well and spent the night with me there. I was so hurt but I wanted him. I was mad at his sister. I wanted her out of our house. without asking her she decided to move out. she did and it was such a relief around the house. I thought maybe my wrong doing is I have a very close male friend because that's what my parents suggested. I told luke we couldn't hang out alone anymore after work to get drinks and I texted him less. we went to our first cousiling session from this round (we went a few time a year ago) and it was really good. 1/2 month later I was still miserably unhappy my husband was still lying to me, avoiding me and I needed advice. I wanted to figure out what I could do when and if I left. I asked luke if he could talk but he was head to work (it was my day off) so he said tomorrow (wednesday). Well the next day came and I didn't hear from him. I hung out with my husband and it was a good evening and then Luke texted me and said how about we talk tomorrow (Thursday) instead. I told him it wasn't a big deal. Friday I got back to work and he mentioned Wednesday night after work he went out drinking with Megan and another co-worker. he was trashed an called in on Thursday. Friday at work he offered someone else his over time for Saturday pm shift. I asked him why because he loves OT and Megan works the other shift so I thought it was weird. he said because he called in he didn't feel like it was worth it to do the OT. made sence but then I found out that Megan was off too so I knew they were going to hang out but he didn't want to tell me for some reason. Saturday came we worked our shift together and we both went home. I was upset he didn't want to tell me the truth about hanging out with Megan. sunday morning at work he said we need to talk. let's talk tomorrow before work. I said okay. that night I talked with my husband about how I value honesty and I will always want the truth even if it hurts. I thought our conversation went very well. Monday morning came (yesterday) I met up with luke and he said to me "am I doing anything to make you end your marriage?" I said no and I was confused. he said "well your mother thinks so." he told me she messaged him on Facebook and when he didn't get a hold of him she went to megan. Megan told my mother I smoke pot, dress like a hooker at work (We're RNs we all wear scrubs), she said I sleep with all the guys at work and I'm on the "watch list" (mind you I just got back to work a week ago because I was on maternity leave and work doesn't have a watch list I've been off). Luke said this happened on Saturday evening. my mother believed it and called my husband Sunday morning. that same morning Alex texted Luke and said don't tell my wife I'm talking to you and don't take her from me. now that same night Alex and I had a conversation about honesty and working on our marriage and I asked him if he had anythibg to say or if he wanted to tell me anything. he said no so when I found out the next morning that he knew what happened and went behind my back was pretty upset. Alex had texted me shortly after I found

out.

my mother also happened to text me around the time i found out.

i havent ate since saturday morning it's now Tuesday about noon. I don't have the appotite. I don't know what I've done. I'm so lost on what I can do.