LONG STORY AGHEAD

I feel like the world is crashing down in everything I have built. I fell in love with my middle school sweetheart at the age of 12. He was my soul. Granted we were both young and didnt realize what love meant so we were constantly off and on. Sometimes we wouldnt talk for months, but when we did it was like nothing changed. I thought i had moved on from him for a while during my senior year of high school.

Last October of course we reconnected once again. We have had our future mapped out from the old days. January 31 our dreams came true and i got pregnant. We both seemed to be overwhelmed but happy.

Fast forward two weeks later when he starts to say he isnt ready for a baby and that i should abort it. I couldnt do it. I have wanted a baby for so long and i didnt believe in having an abortion. He broke up with me and went back with his ex who had lost their baby a year before.

Im in love with him and i shouldnt be. I have going to all my appointment but last week i found out that i have herpes. Obviously from him. I was furious but i really dont know how to stay mad at him. He doesnt want anything to do with me. He wants to be there for the baby and it hurts me thats he feels this way towards me. After 7 years, it seems so unreal. Im 12 weeks pregnant and im scared for what the future has in store.

A lot of people just tell me to ignore him and he will come looking for me but its so hard to do when i just want to tell him about my day even if he doesnt answer.

Anyone got any input on my story. Im sorry it was so long but i havent been able to really talk much and i feel like im just depressed half the time. But the thoughts only come out when im about to go to sleep.