Blended family issues

So I have a boyfriend that Iv been with for about 9 months and I have children from a past marriage.. apparently my parenting type and his are different, well things blew up and he told me I don’t discipline my children enough and he went off on me, I’m young and my kids are 5 and 3 so they are “wild” no matter what you do.. he said he doesn’t want to discipline but I should and he gets mad anytime they do something he doesn’t agree with and yells at me for it when I have gave him permission to fuss at them or put them in time out.. (I prefer he didnt spank them unless 100% needed) but I’m not sure what to do here?? I’m trying but I feel like it’s not fair. Someone give me advice maybe?