Hello ladies, I’ve been estranged from my mother for years and due to mental and physical abuse from her since I was little I finally cut her out of my life 6 months ago. She’s made no effort to contact me to fix things so I let my grandmother (who raised me basically) tell her about my pregnancy as I felt she didn’t deserve to hear from me . She went insane apparently even though she had me much younger and I have my life together e.g have a degree, have a house, have an amazing boyfriend/baby dad etc. She’s always hated me so this isn’t a shock.

The tricky thing is she’s a senior midwife at my local hospital and I don’t want her anywhere near me or the baby especially when I’m in labour! Some people have told me if I request for her to not come into contact she won’t but others have said I can’t stop her . She doesn’t want me to give birth in her hospital as it’ll make her look bad in front of her colleagues that she can’t see her own child or grandchild but why should I have to drive an hour to another hospital so she doesn’t feel awkward. But I also don’t want to worry about her walking in when I’m in labour!

I’m so confused as to what to decide!

(Also my community midwife is her best friend so she can’t give me unbiased advice )