So, I’m 17 weeks with my first. I weighed myself today (which I regret) and I’m miserable.

Here’s the story: I’ve usually been in the smaller side (except for a couple partying years where I drank anything with alcohol it in and ate constantly). I’ve struggled with anorexia and bulimia most of my adult life. I’m 29.

I’ve been clean of eating disorders for a couple years; but get anxiety when gaining weight. I work out semi-regularly (when not exhausted from work).

But the last couple months, I’ve been out of the gym here and there due to pulled muscles and first trimester exhaustion. I’ve been eating not great due to cravings.

Today I weighed 130lbs when I’m normally at 120 or lower. I feel like that’s way too much weight gain for second trimester. I’m terrified I’m going to gain too much but at the same time, I don’t know what’s normal and healthy for a pregnancy.

Am I gaining too quickly or should I be okay? I think my old eating disorder mind is getting me worried when maybe I shouldn’t be?? Help please!! My anxiety is making me stop looking in the mirror or even feel bad when I shower and see my body.

Here’s a recent pic: