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That's ridiculous. My sex drive goes up and down when I'm pregnant (we have 4 kids) I'll admit that every so often I'll have 'courtesy sex' for my husband but it's certainly not every day and my husband isn't whiny and pressuring me. He married you for better or worse, not just so you can fulfill his needs.
Being a selfish wife 😔
So I’m currently 11+3 and my sex drive since I found out I was pregnant has just dropped to nonexistent. I had some issues with spotting and stuff so we didn’t have sex for a couple of weeks and he understood that. My problem is although I have zero sex drive or desire to be anywhere near his junk he doesn’t want to leave me alone. He pesters me for sex or blow job like everyday... I know it’s not fair to neglect him and I feel like I’m just being selfish but I just don’t want to right now. Thing is when I have explained no sex drive he gets all sad and mopey because I obv don’t love him anymore blah blah blah (and tbh this attitude turns me off even more!). I just don’t know what to do ladies, do I just give in and have sex and bjs when I don’t want to and be miserable myself or do I make him miserable too and decline all the time 😔 urgh, hormones lol 😂
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Da
Thanks for the reply. I’m probably making it more of a thing than it is but honestly it is quite often or he will make a comment about how long it’s been and I know it has I’m just not feeling it. I think after my next scan I’ll feel a little better and hopefully my hormones will even out and I won’t be as tired but that’s just hope. My first successful preg I got uncomfortable and painful quickly so I’m hoping t doesn’t this time and maybe I can enjoy sex again at some point lol
Girl I’m 35 weeks pregnant and we had a lot of sex up until the 3rd trimester but it starts to not feel great and your bump gets in the way. Positions have to be switched. It’s not your duty to have sex with him lol he’s got a hand! You’re growing a baby and if you don’t feel like doing it you dont have to. He shouldn’t guilt you into it though!
K
Totally understandable!
Da
I’m hoping it get my libido back in the second trimester after my next scan. I’ve just been so stressed and anxious this pregnancy!!
You shouldn't have to do anything you don't want to do, he should be a grown up and accept that your sex drive has decreased especially since you're pregnant...Do not force yourself to please him and let him be a child and sulk about it...
Da
Thanks for replying. I know what you mean but I just feel bad cos we have gone from sex at least once a day to once a week if he is lucky!
My sexdrives like this, my partner decided to do something for me instead of demanding I do him favours. He went down on me and honestly for a split second my sex drive was back. maybe your other half should please you a little and you would be more inclined to return the favour. It's a two way street after all!! Just explain hes got to turn you on first. x
Da
I guess but even if he tries idk I just feel gross down there right now. Nothing has changed I just don’t want him touching my there lol. It’s weird. But maybe it might work, suppose it won’t hurt to give it a try. Thanks ladies 😊
Ab
Totally agree with you. If you want me to please you, you gotta be doing some seriously hard work turning me on! 😂
Er
that's what I do with my husband. I just tell him "yeah, we can have sex, but I'm totally not up for it. you'll just have a lot of turning on to do 😉"
Maybe you could talk to him one more time, explain your situation but at the same time validate his feelings. Tell him you understand it must be difficult, but you need his support right now as your body is going through all sorts of changes. Tell him that you love him and you find him attractive, you're just not into anything sexual right now. Maybe you can suggest that he watches some erotic movies and pleases himself (stress that you'd be fine with that). Also, cuddle a lot!
Jo
Well there are many ways to be physically close, without actually being intimate. I think that's a pretty good compromise! Just take it easy, you're not a bad wife just because your sex drive is low. Creating a little human is hard work!
Da
I have no problem with that and he knows that he just misses the closeness and stuff I think. It’s difficult cos I want him to know I still love him and he’s my man but at the same time I’m kinda like just leave my body alone right now 😂
My sex drive has been very low with this pregnancy as well. It wasn’t like that with my first. I’ve also dealt with pain during and after sex this entire pregnancy. My husband knows what’s going on and is very patient and understanding. We are a no porn or masterbation couple, so I make sure that even if I’m not necessarily dying to have sex, I have sex with him routinely - usually a couple of times per week. I know sex isn’t just for me. Usually I enjoy the closeness and making him happy. It’s been an emotional thing, but continuing to have sex and talking calmly about it with him has helped a lot.
Re
I know it’s all so weird and emotional! And hard! I understand!!
Da
I mean I shouldn’t complain when we do have sex it is uncomfortable but usually quick cos it’s been a while so overall it’s probably easier just to do it and that be that plus I like it makes him happy. I just feel so weird down there right now 🤷♀️
My sex drive is crazy now. I get horny a lot and my fiancé knows he can't always help. Which is fine. Be bought be a toy! 😭
Da
I guess it goes one way or the other 😂 I used to have a really high sex drive before being pregnant which can’t help, he is used to it at least once a day. I’m just not feeling it right now, hoping second trimester brings it back! Lol
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