When/how did you decide to start TTC?

How long have you ladies been with your partners, and when/how did you decide to start trying for babies? If It's not your first, how did you know you were ready for another one?

For myself and hubby, it was a very sudden decision -- even though we've been together for almost 11 years and married for 9 (anniversary next month!) -- it was a long time before I was sure that I was ready. I told him when we first got serious that I was unsure if and when I would want kids, but that it would probably be a long while before I would know if I was ready. He said he was fine with that. Early on in the relationship, we came up with this little joke between us -- essentially, we were compiling a fictitious list of names that we would NEVER name our future children 😂 when we would hear a name that we didn't like, we would say "that's going on the list."

For years, people have asked us "when, when, when?!" and when I would say something along the lines of "maybe in a few years, we're not ready yet." and he would generally just nod along in agreement. What I didn't know then, was actually that he was secretly wanting babies, but he was afraid to tell me. He would make comments to me every once in a while about how he thought I should go off of my birth control -- but he would always say things like "because you don't seem as happy since you've been on it, it affects your mood," or "it could be messing up your body," and because he's such a naturalist (he's the type of person who literally won't even take a Tylenol if he feels like he's dying) I didn't find these comments unusual in the slightest.

I started to feel like I was close to being ready a couple of years ago, but he seemed indifferent when I brought it up. I asked him what he thought about us having kids, and he said, "I always thought it would just kind of 'happen,' sometime, you know?" I laughed and told him that wouldn't be the case, because we needed make the decision for me to stop my birth control. I told him I definitely wanted to start before 35, and again he just nodded. I figured he still wasn't ready, and that was fine. For years, I truly thought we were on the same page. I thought we were getting there, slowly.

Back in the end of October, beginning of November 2017, I was taking antibiotics and missed several of my birth control pills in one week. I ended up being late and having a lot of symptoms, and it seemed like the worst possible timing. Hubby had lost his job, we were on a really tight deadline to move, he was having a lot of personal family issues, and we were just all around stressed out. I was so scared to tell him, I thought it might send him over the edge. To my surprise, he was so calm about it. He was HAPPY. I was HAPPY. I got a faint positive, and two days later, I started my period, and it was a really bad one. We were both so heartbroken. He said it was the first thing that made him feel like he had "wind in his sails" for the first time in a long time.

He asked me why I was so afraid to tell him, and when I told him I just thought the timing was bad and that I didn't think was ready, he shook his head and said, "I've been ready to have babies with you since we were laying in bed at your old house, making up names and making our 'list.' I've just been waiting for you to be ready." 😍😍😍 I swear my ovaries about burst at that moment. That's when I decided to stay off the birth control and start trying, and he was so over the moon. I was so surprised, because in all these years, he's never even mentioned wanting to have kids. Every time we were asked, he let me answer. He never gave me any reason to think otherwise. I asked him why he never said anything, and he said he didn't want me to feel pressured at all, he wanted me to be fully ready and know that it was the right time. That's also when he told me he tried hinting that he wanted me to stop my birth control 😂 sometimes I wish I'd have known, so we could have started sooner, but at the same time, I feel like this is all just right and the way it was supposed to happen. He's been such an amazing husband, and I know he'll be an even more amazing father. 💕