Breaking up is hard to do.

My for bf broke up with me. It was the same day we made 9 months. I thought our relationship was getting better but obviously he was thinking something different...

Our relationship hasn’t been easy, we’re both in college with so many things to do but we usually always made some sort of time for each other. This past semester wasn’t easy due to his pledging process but we got through it. I stuck through it. I love him and it was nothing i wouldn’t do for him.

Lately i senses a disconnect, he seemed stressed and weird and it was starting to worry me. After asking him about it he finally says “ I don’t feel like i want to be in a relationship”... so of course that ended what we had. He still wants to be there for me but how do i let him be there for me after he just crushed my heart ? He’s my first true love , I’ve opened up to him about my suicide attempts , my depression and my anxiety. I was at a place where i found comfort in him and now it’s no longer there. I’m scared that I’m going to become depressed from this and I’ve been trying so hard to stay okay.

He kept telling me us not being together will help us grow then if it’s meant to be we’ll pick up where we left off... i don’t understand that. Am i suppose to wait for him ? He won’t explain any of it to me.

I’m a wreck with no clue how to handle this.

Sorry i just really needed to vent somewhere...