So stressed

My mom and my bf don’t always get along it’s been a tough four and a half yrs with them but I have had an issue with how my mom will watch my sisters child bc she works but also will watch her when ever my sister asks and for free and my sister doesn’t even provide food for my niece and yet bcz I’m a stay at home mom with a very terminally ill 8yr old and a add and adhd 6.5yr she feels she shouldn’t have to watch my kids I rarely ask anyone or even let anyone take my kids bcz there mine and I love being with them all the time even when my daughter drives me crazy or it’s been a long sleepless few nights with my son but still I have been a mother for 8.5yrs and done most of it by myself and I don’t understand how my mother can constantly tell me no when I only ask for a few hours or a night and that’s like maybe and a big maybe once a month but when she says no I explain how much I don’t like that she feels like she is treating everyone fairly like this weekend my daughter spent the weekend with my parents bcz my daughter wanted some one on one time with them and my mother ends up keeping my niece the entire weekend as well and she still doesn’t see that it’s not right and says she does spend the same amount of money on each grandchild which is a complete lie my niece goes everywhere with them and eats with them daily that’s money too ugghh am I wrong for feeling like my kids aren’t being treated equally just bcz I don’t have to work doesn’t mean I don’t deserve a little break here n there and doesn’t mean u treat my niece better than my kids and I love my mom and life is to short and I hate when we fight bcz it makes me angry enough to sometimes want to say she can’t be in the delivery room this time and I don’t want that but I also don’t want or need the tension she’s going to cause with the baby’s father but I can’t imagine my life wothout my parents and I want my mom to be a part of it so it will happen I just want her to understand where we are coming from and that we don’t want my kids ever feeling neglected or unloved and she doesn’t like that I don’t want my bf to step up and be dad to my son bcz my sons father has always been in his life and does what he needs to do as a dad and my daughters dad isn’t in her life and she loves my bf and has called him dad and my mom is still married to my dad the father of all of her kids and she doesn’t get it bcz I have three different fathers for my children so my life is different than hers and different from my siblings lives I want her to know I’m happy and my kids are happy and we want to be loved and treated equally and respected for our choices in our lives