I can’t take it anymore..

I can’t handle the racing thoughts anymore. I can’t even try and enjoy my life cause as soon as I’m around people, I have an anxiety attack. I feel everything and have mental break downs constantly. I don’t feel like I’m worthy of love or friendship. I’ve self-harmed before. I relapsed last year. The thoughts have been coming back. My emotions are out of control. My attacks are more often and beginning to become more frequent. I have no one. I’ve pushed them all away. I need help. I need someone to talk to who understands me