How? seems like a curse.

Question

I was raped/molested multiple times growing up. my boyfriend is very understanding about the situation. my problem is I want to make love without thinking of those horrible people. I want to do it without stopping. I don't want those thoughts in my head and it seems like they haunt me. I just want a normal sex life with my boyfriend. Any advice? please.

Answer

Take it one step at a time... I've been out of the majority of abuse for 5 years.... the last time anything major happened to me was about 10 months ago. So all that to say that I'm still working through things with my fiance. If I start thinking about things while we are in the middle of being intimate, we stop immediately and I tell him what I'm thinking and we just cuddle or go take a shower and move about our day. Now that I've been doing that for a few months we are starting to get to a point where it's few and far between when I think about things. It takes time and you have to allow yourself to heal. I know that time is not something that you want to hear but just be open to healing and one day it will be so so much better.

How? seems like a curse.

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