Product of Incest

My oldest sister just confirmed to me of what I had already suspected all along; my nephew is a product of incest. She was torn apart because she has decided that it's time he knows the truth. My nephew is going to turn 14 yrs old this month.

Back story:

Both my parents are immigrants from Mexico and just like any other immigrant family that comes to the US, they had to work twice as hard to earned enough money to support their family. My parents had five children and my oldest sister always took care of us when my parents were working. I'm the middle child and I'm 26 yrs old and my oldest sister is 33 yrs old. I can remember that I when was little, we would constantly move. Sometimes we would move to houses that my parents would rent or we would move in with my mother's family members. It all depended on how they were doing financially. I never thought of anything wrong with this because I never saw anything bad happened. But of course I was wrong. Since my parents were always working, that means we were left with my oldest sister. She was barely a little kid herself, so she lived through the worst during these years. She remembers being raped as early as she was 3 yrs old. THREE people raped her as she grew up and some of them were my mother's family members. (Mom doesn't know about this and my sister is not ready to tell her). She grew up feeling unloved and lonely and lost.

To how my nephew was conceived:

I remember when I was still in elementary school, my oldest sister would always be so close to one of our cousins. He was about 5 years older than my sister. I didn't think too much of it but it stuck with me. He's the son of mother's sister, so he's our first cousin. At that time, we lived my grandmother, my aunt and her son. We lived there for a good while but I remember there was a HUGE fight that happened which is why we left.

Fast forward years later, my sister is getting close to high school graduation and my cousin pops into our lives again. At this point my parents had bought their first house and we were finally living in our own home (no more moving!) I thought life was great. My cousin was helping my parents with work and he would spend most of his days with us. I was older and I started to notice that my sister was getting close to my cousin again. But this time I could understand what was going on. I knew they had a relationship and they were horrible at hiding it. When my parents would be out of town, my cousin would be there with us and I don't think my parents knew about this. I was a kid myself, so I was too confused on what to do. When my sister started college, she told me that she was in a relationship with my cousin and asked if I was okay with it. I said yes because I was very confused. I loved them both, so I didn't see anything wrong with it. Within weeks of her telling me this, my parents find out of their relationship. I remember vividly my mom asking me if I knew anything about what was going on between my sister and my cousin. I remember crying and telling her the truth but I felt like I was betraying my sister. Thus is when everything went crazy and ugly. We were kept in the dark of what was going on but we knew it was something extremely horrible. My parents gave my sister and ultimátum of either leaving with us and never seeing him ever again, or her staying with him and forgetting she has a family. My sister chose us. We packed everything, my parents put the house for sale, and we left to Mexico. That's where she finds out she's pregnant.

His "Father":

Within the first few months of living in Mexico, I did noticed my sister's stomach growing. But what confused me is that her boyfriend in Mexico did not seem to care. I was extremely confused because I knew she was pregnant but I didn't know who was the father, my cousin or her "new" boyfriend. The reason I was confused was because I started to noticed that he would talk to her stomach and would care for her so much. At this point, I had believed that it was his kid. My nephew was born in the US and his "father" gave him his last name. My nephew had a father when he was born and within the first year of his life. But my sister got pregnant again right after having my first nephew. My second nephew is in fact product of my sister's boyfriend from Mexico. But when my sister was able 8months pregnant, her boyfriend got drunk and went crazy (he was an alcoholic but stopped when he got with my sister). My sister kicked him out and in the end he left days after to the US. So he didn't show up in my nephews lives until about 3 years after my second nephew was born. That's the only time he has physically seen my nephews after he and my sister split.

My nephews real father figure is my dad, their grandpa. My nephews grew up believing my dad was their father because he was only father figure around.

So my oldest sister has decided to tell my nephews the truth. Everything. She's torn apart because of the mistakes she has done. She doesn't know how to tell this to her son. How do you tell your kid that he's a product of incest? My sister has so many issues that she's trying to overcome. She started seeing a therapist this year. She's been diagnosed with borderline bi-polar and has depression. She recognized that she's an alcoholic. Even though she has so many issues, she loves her kids and communicates with them so much. She has a great relationship with them. She shows them the love she never got from my parents. She also understands that my parents were absent in our lives because they were trying to provide for us the best they could.

Has anyone gone through anything like this? The fear that we all have is that this will break my nephew. She doesn't want him to change. She doesn't know if he will hate her or hate himself. Any advice is helpful. Thanks.

Sorry for the long post.

I forgot to mention that my cousin, the real father, doesn’t know that he has a son. We have never heard or seen from him since we left almost 15years ago.