so how do i even start this, I’ve always been insecure of my body. i’m not fat, i know this. but let’s just say i’m not where i WANT to be. ideally my weight is pretty normal and healthy. but point is bc of these insecurities of mine, i’ve always been so shy, around boys. i’ve had about two serious boyfriends before my current relationship and i’ve had sex within the relationships. but i never was comfortable enough, with myself i should add, that to talk about sex. like they were doing ME a favor not mutually as it should be. i hope i’m making sense. i’m trying to. so, with that being said i never want to initiate sex with my current bf. even tho i truly want to and he happens to not take my hints on the regular. the outcome has been me feeling unwanted by my bf and him thinking i don’t want him bc the only time we have sex is because he initiates it and i never do. we’ve had a conversation before thats how i know he feels that way, but that really didn’t change anything. end of rant. just wanted to let it out i guess.