Boundaries

Hi ladies! I’m currently 17 weeks pregnant, due November 24th with my first child. I have a particularly overbearing mother-in-law who thinks that my marriage with her son revolves around her. She does not respect our privacy, or care that some things should be left between us.

I’m starting to worry about the birth. My in-laws live 3 hours away, and I’m not entirely sure I want a bunch of people from out of town coming to stay at our house right after I give birth and have a newborn at home. I’m also concerned with having a bunch of people passing around our baby during cold and flu season.

My husband is already butting heads with me that I don’t want them sitting in our hospital room all day right after I give birth, or have them crash at our house while we are trying to bond with a newborn baby, and figure everything out. Knowing his mom, she has a huge problem with being intrusive, opinionated, nosey, and just plain mean sometimes. I’m scared as to how I will react to her, given my hormonal state after I’ve just given birth. I want them to see and meet the baby, but I want to establish boundaries. I doubt I will feel like entertaining a bunch of house guests when we get home from the hospital with a tiny baby, and I will probably be in some amount of pain. And we will be tired. How have you handled this? My husband basically said they are going to come to town whether he invites them or not. What have you said to in-laws and parents when you wanted a certain level of personal space with your newborn? How have you established boundaries ahead of time? Or you can just tell me I’m crazy, if that’s the case. 🤣 I don’t mind if they come see the baby - not one bit. I just know how his mother is, and I doubt she will be very receptive to me wanting a bit of time with just my husband and our newborn BY OURSELVES.