Something that happened to me WARNING ⚠️ LANGUAGE IS USED!!!

When I was 6 or 7 years old I had a friend who lived above me. At this time my parents were divorced and I would see my dad on Sunday’s and that’s when I would usually see my friend, we’ve known each for a long time and my parents knew hers.

One day her dad wasn’t home and she told me to go in the closet with her, after that....she said if I licked her “area” she would to the same to me.

I was very young and didn’t know about that stuff yet, so I said yes

I blame her because later on when I was 11 and I had already gotten my period at 8, I would use my free time going on my laptop and showing my area to others on video chat.

Sometimes I can’t believe I would do such a thing that would still affect me. And because of this I blame her entirely when my mother found out I thought she was going to have a heart attack or better yet as she said “ kill me”. I’ve stopped doing all of that know and I’ve tried to be a better person but sometimes I just wished I would’ve said “no” and that way no one of this chaos would’ve happened.

I have stopped talking to her and it’s going to stay that way.

My father is a dipshit asshole

Can I get advice from anyone about how I should be doing? bc most of the time I feel like it’s my fault and even my mother blames me.

Thank you for listening