So sad all the time


9 months preggo and feeling extremely depressed. After everything came out with my husband, life has been hell for me. Just the realization of what he had been doing and who the father of my children really is. My pride and joy was being a stay at home mom and making things nice for the kids and hubby. Going above and beyond for them. Now knowing that all the memories we shared was all a lie is making me really depressed. I can’t enjoy the last couple weeks of pregnancy because I am so stressed out about my life and the years spent with a man who was busy getting his dick wet somewhere else. It’s so hard and at times impossible to find joy in my day to day life. I try and stay focused on the kids but I know that it is just a matter of time before I have to deal with the separation. I feel so unsafe. So unsure and so sad that our newest daughter won’t even have an idea what it was like for mom and dad to be together. This is so hard because my husband was never the one to go out or be rude or lazy. He was the one who did everything he could for his family. Always there, and loving. Never raised his voice to me or a hand in all the 8 years we have been together. A good voice of reason and a person his family could rely on. So it’s not just as easy as throwing him to the curb. Life is so messed and sometimes I find myself frozen in my steps and crying. I know life doesn’t stay the same and that things will get better for me and my girls but going through this is really hard. Sorry for the long post I needed to vent. 💔💔💔