What would you do?

Question

Every so often we have the “what would you do if you caught your kid having sex” conversation, and some people say that their kid isn’t welcome to have sex under their roof, they’d be grounded etc.
To mix it up a bit: what would you do if you caught your kid masturbating?
I’d walk out of the room and pretend it never happened 😳

Accepted Answer

Idk I knock before going into anyone’s room. And then wait a couple seconds before entering. 
Tbf if you’re the type to just barge into rooms without making your presence known idc if you end up getting yourself into an awkward situation.

Answer

On the flip side what would you do if you caught your parent masturbating?
A friend once went home from school and early and her mother and out of her bedroom looking flustered. Then my friend heard a noise from inside the bedroom, it turned out her mother was having a bit of "me time" and in her rush to get out of the bedroom she knocked her vibrator under her bed where it was buzzing loudly and echoing from the wooden floor. 
We still regularly remind her of this and it happened 20years ago 😂

Answer

I don’t think this would happen to me because I have the decency to knock on doors before entering lol. But I’d definitely walk out and never speak of it again 😂

Answer

Omg that happen to my son, & at first I didn’t know what to do I threw up in my dinning room then I had to have his dad talk to him cause I was baffled

Answer

A moment of TMI...
My daughter is currently 11, looks and acts like she’s 16 though, and I haven’t seen her doing it in a long time.
I have no idea if she still does this or found another way but she used to sit criss-cross style and sit on her hands and grind. She would do it anywhere. The first time I saw it and I had a talk with her that it’s normal but needs to be in private. She got a little better about it but was doing it in the living room and would try to act all nonchalant, red cheeks and all, if she saw someone. I talked with her again, this needs to be done in your bedroom or the bathroom with the door shut. She did it at my mom’s, mom had talks with her. She’d go in bursts of doing it a lot in front of people or in a highly used area of the house and then there would be a long while where we didn’t see it and figured she caught on to doing it in private.
In 1st grade, her teacher told me she was doing it quite a bit during circle time and kids were catching on that she was doing it. I was mortified, never expected her to do it at school. Teacher asked if maybe she had a yeast infection or UTI that was the cause. I told her I’d talk to her doctor but it wasn’t the case. I had a huge talk with my daughter again and thankfully it stopped at school.
So now... I don’t know if I even want to tell this part. It’s frustrating and the only people that know are my mom and boyfriend. Ok, so now she does it strictly in private (yay!) but I have had issues of her peeing in her room for over a year, and I think it’s from masturbating. One day I went in her room and instantly smelled it, found towels that were just soaked. She wasn’t home, so when I picked her up the next day we talked for a little while and then I told her I had to ask a question. I didn’t want her to be upset or embarrassed but I had to know and I promised I wouldn’t be angry about her answer. I asked her if she was doing it and why (accident? Couldn’t get to the bathroom fast enough?) otherwise it must be the cat (cat pee has a distinct smell and I was 98% sure this wasn’t the case) she told me it was her and it was an accident, she woke up and she couldn’t make it to the bathroom (also, never had issues with her having accidents in the middle of the night or anything, maybe 3 ever before this) I told her accidents happen and we don’t need to be ashamed or embarrassed but she does need to tell me as soon as it happens so it can get taken care of.
And it kept happening. It keeps happening. We’ve discussed it several times, I lost my patience one time and told her flat out I thought it was from her masturbating and if that’s what happens when she does that, she needs to start doing it in the bathroom or something rather than in her carpeted room on towels. 
She’s been gone the past 3 nights at a friend’s house and I’ve spent the past 3 days in her room washing all her blankets, scrubbing her mattress (doesn’t seem to be on the much if at all) and the floor. I am attempted to rip her carpeting out because I feel like the smell is always there. She hasn’t had a sleepover at home in ages because of this and some days when you walk into my house (her room is close to the front door) you can smell it immediately. It’s embarrassing when guests come over because I know they can smell it if I smell it and I’m in my house day after day. It’s not like I don’t clean it. I’ve spent so much time cleaning. 
I’ve made her scrub her floor and put the towels in the washer, we’ve told her repeatedly she cannot bring towels into her room, she doesn’t for a while and then she does (I believe she does this right after she showers and then of course she leaves them in there). I’m ready to lock up the towels and she can come to me when she needs one and then it immediately needs to be put back. 
I’m just at my wits end with this. I know I did this as a young child but I never peed from masturbation and I didn’t realize I could squirt until I was an adult (no shame) and I can also orgasm without squirting so I don’t know if that’s what is happening here and it’s all pee right now because she’s so young or what? I know people are probably going to come back saying squirting is the same as peeing but nope. There may be some urine present but it’s not exactly the same and I’m not going to entertain any debates on this topic. Thanks.
Anyway, back to the main point of the original post. You walk into a room with a closed door, that’s on you and you should feel guilty for not knocking and apologize. Let them know it’s normal and it’s on you for walking in. If they’re doing it in a not so private area, tell them it’s normal to do that but it also is something no one else needs to see happen. Basically, don’t shame it. Normalize it and let your kids know they can come to them if they ever have questions.

Answer

My toddler likes fishing her hand in her diaper 😂 if we're at home, I remind her that we play with our vulva in our room, and make sure to wash her hands when she's moved on to something more entertaining. Its not sexual for her and I know it, she's just intrigued with her body. She plays with her feet with the same level of interest lol when she's older, I will always knock before entering her room, so I hope I never catch her masturbating 🤷‍♀️ but if I did, it'd be no big deal. I would leave the room and wait for her to approach me if she wanted to talk about it.

Answer

I hope I remember to knock, but if it does happen I’m 100% walking out and pretending it never happened 😳😂

Answer

I would pretend I didn’t see anything.

Answer

This probably wouldn’t happen to me cause I knock and wait for an answer before just barging in.

Answer

I’d just pretend like I never saw it lol.

What would you do?

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