pls just let things get better.. 💙

this is something i posted to my spam page a while ago i and i truly feel this way. i feel like there’s so many things wrong with me and i just become exhausted with myself. (i’m 18 by the way)

i’m crying just rereading this. i’m just tired of hurting.

lately things have gotten worse. i have a bestfriend who i love dearly she knows me better than anyone else. our friendship has always been rocky bc my parents weren’t too keen on her and i hate it so much. but bc shit has gotten worse for me i haven’t been giving her much attention and it was hurting her. i wasn’t intentionally doing it, i just feel so lost. i haven’t wanted to talk about my problems or talk to anyone really. she thinks because i spend more time with other people more than her that i don’t care and that’s not true at all. and i hate i made her feel that way. she was angry when she came at me and i completely understand why. i’m going to share our messages here(while blurring information to keep everything anonymous) (also its a little lengthy) is

(the post i posted was me saying i’m going off the grid bc i was over everything(i can be a little melodramatic sometimes lol))

and her response is exactly why i love her, she’s always been so caring and loving. we’re fine but it’s going to take a lot on my part to keep us this way. i hate she thinks i’m like dodging her but it’s not even the case. when i hang out with my other friends it’s easier for me to play a different part and hide everything and kinda forget. i can’t do that around her cause she sees right through me. but anyways yeah this is my story and my sad life that i wish would change already bc i’m tired of being sad and hurting the ones i love unintentionally.

sorry it was so long, and if you made it to the end thank you so much 💙 pls leave anything to say.