Do I Tell Him it’s Not His Baby - Please don’t pass without some little advice.

PLEASE READ THE WHOLE THING TI UNDERSTAND. I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP AND ADVICE LADIES!!

I broke with my ex of 5 years because he spent a number of years cheating on me with prostitutes ( he hid it good for a long time) and also neglected me affection both physically and verbally. He claimed he didn’t know how to express himself, so I stuck around because I loved him and the second year together we had a son.

One thing I did wrong was give him a fantasy. I did it like an idiot in hopes that he would finally love me and see that he can stop this mess and I am the one. He always asked for it so one day I took a deep breath and did it. Threesome with another females. One of our friends. It was fine. An ok experience but nothing I would jump to do again. Or excited about. But after that he kept pestering me about more of that and even telling me we may not work because he wants a relationship with that kind of sex life. I felt so used. But he apologized and said he was just really excited.

One day I found his device filled with 10 different women requesting to meet in a hotel and giving him prices for sex. I almost threw up and cry for days. To be honest I am still not over it after a year and am in therapy. I didn’t mention that he cheated on me when I was pregnant. Yes I know stupid I stayed. I loved him so much and forgave him. But after seeing his device it’s been hell since. Eventually after a while he kept begging for me bag and I felt obligated for our son and I did still love him, but later this year he had sex pills ( cialis) wrapped up with 600 dollars in his car compartment. I flipped and got flash backs and it brought in a huge fight between us. We never got back together but because he was coming to see our son some days we were on and off and had sex a few times.

One day I slept with a a guy. We are friends. Problem is he is not very mature , just a lot of fun. Sometimes he is serious but he doesn’t have much going for himself . My ex saw I was getting big in the belly and eventually I told him I was pregnant. I told both men. But my ex doesn’t know I slept with someone else.

Last few weeks neither of them really cared or supported me during this pregnancy. My ex seems more concerned about spending time with our son but he doesn’t talk much about the pregnancy. The other guy is in denial but part him wants it ( again immature). I still have a lot of feelings for my ex and as I said trying to heal from the things he did. I feel stupid that I still want him and our family together. But I have been avoiding him to try to heal.

Anyway I did a non invasive paternity test and it came back as the other guy not my ex. I told the guy and he can’t believe it and was lost for words. He claims he he doesn’t know what to say or do ( that makes me feel good ). I did not tell my ex it’s not his , we don’t talk much anymore like I said because all we do is fight and he blames his cheating on me. I just cry. I don’t feel like he ever cared.

I don’t know if I should tell him or not. Some people told me it’s non of his business anymore. He been cheating and he is not part of my life. Others say let them both know. I was thinking to tell him after the baby is born because I know if I tell him now - he will do everything to hurt me verbally, dog me out and make look like some whore etc. a part of me thinks he deserve that betrayal for what he did to me but another part of me is like just fuck him and take care. Even in therapy he laughs that I have to go because it’s a Joke. He said he knows he did wrong but I need to get over it and communicate with him for a long time for our son. I know this but I loved that man so much that I feel broken.lastly my pregnancy is high risk.

Sorry for the long post! I hope this helps to give great advice. Please be nice ladies I can’t handle bad talk right now. Advice please!!!

By the way we are not sleeping together and sometimes he wishes we could be close like before where he can stay over etc. but I don’t let him because I want to get over him. He also likes to still text me as if nothing happened. Because he doesn’t want to talk about it anymore, just want me to forget the past. ( so easy for him to say). I feel so played out all these years and at the end of the day he won. No matter how hard I fought to keep us a family - he tore it apart by sleeping around and now he can still be in my life becaus of our son ( this is what he says), he got his fantasy, he got his secret sex behind my back and he got a part of my heart ( our son). 💔 I got a broken heart and single parenting.