Hey! My SO and I have nice sex. Sometimes it’s great, other times it’s a nice pass time. We’ve had a lot of intimacy issues (no cheating but lots of insecurity/hurt feelings/porn addiction/difficulty with being open) in the past and lately it’s been very honest and great.

We’ve finally healed the broken communication and have sex regularly.

I’m very thankful that we’re in this place and have trust and sexual desire to be together in a while.

However... he’s not making me cum. When I talk to him about it, I can tell he gets very insecure about it and flustered. He’s made me cum before and he’s good at it. But oh boy, could I use some more orgasms.

It’s difficult for me because we’ve just removed all this old anxious baggage from our sex and my orgasms are causing it to come back.

He’s never a jerk about it, honestly, he’s kind and caring. But he gets so insecure and anxious that he’s not fulfilling me - it’s obviously not sexy and not helping him perform. It’s also difficult for me to encourage him while we’re at it, cause it doesn’t help me relax into an orgasm.

Any suggestions?

How do I encourage him, healthily, to get in dis pussy and make her feel good. Without turning us both into awkward messes lol.

My orgasm isn’t going to happen if he’s there trying and trying and feeling hyper sensitive and if I’m directing him every step of the way.